Purify Me, Lord, From My Hidden Faults, Psalm 19: 13

Dan Doyle

I am a sinner. This realization brings very real pain. There is, of course, the social pain of embarrassment in such an admission, especially if my error is publicly known and experienced, and the psychological pain of shame and guilt tied to the kind of moral error I committed. But the real pain is in the realization in the depths of my mind and heart that I have broken faith, my sacred bond toward my “neighbor,” that ‘my’ words or ‘my’ deeds have caused real harm, great or small, which is an offense against God who made us both. It is the recognition that no rationalization or excuse on my part can separate me from my words or deeds and the consequences that arise from them.

Here is the paradoxical truth: such recognition can only arise from a humble mind and a heart. The virtue of humility is a gift of God’s grace. It is humility that gives us the courage to admit our errors, the desire to repent of them, and the courage to accept whatever penance (legal or spiritual) is required of us in recompense for the harm we have caused by our decisions and actions. Thomas Aquinas says of a humble man, “The truly humble man considers himself inferior to others not because of external acts, but because he fears he may be accomplishing even the good he does through hidden pride.”

This humility relieves me from the sin of judging others because it helps me to recognize that there is no sin that others have committed that I myself, in my weakness or ignorance, could not commit, given similar circumstances. Augustine puts it this way, “If I have not committed it, it is because God in his mercy has not permitted it and has kept me in the good.” The humble person can look at even the worst sinner with pity and even mercy, recognizing that without God’s generous graces, recognized and willingly received, “I could be in his place.” Paul remonstrates against the prideful who are so willing to judge others without looking into their own hearts in his First Letter to the Corinthians: “For who makes you different from anyone else? What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?” (1 Cor. 4:7)

The truth is that we are all sinners in need of God’s grace and mercy. Because this is true, we need to pray and practice humility to be more careful about judging others. Jesus challenges us, saying: “Stop judging, that you may not be judged. For as you judge, so you will be judged, and the measure with which you measure will be measured out to you. Why do you notice the splinter in your brother’s eye, but do not perceive the wooden beam in your own eye” (Mt. 7:1-3)? Who am I to judge others when I am often not even aware of my own faults and sinful behaviors? Indeed, the harms that I may unwittingly cause to others because of my own unrecognized faults may be greater than those that I condemn others for. Hence the psalmist’s prayer: “Yet who can detect his own failings? Purify me, Lord, from my hidden faults” (Ps. 19:13).

Humility is the virtue that gives me the will to look within, into my own heart with courage and honesty to recognize my faults and failings. Humility helps me come before God and lift my faults and failings to him to be cleansed from my heart and mind. Humility frees me from embarrassment, shame, and guilt and gives me the courage to do penance and actively seek forgiveness from those I have harmed, and from God. Humility removes my foolish pride and helps me to recognize that I am no better than anyone else in the eyes of God. It relieves me from the temptation to judge and opens me up, rather, to practice the holy arts of mercy, kindness, and forgiveness.

Lord, we pray that you increase in each of us the immeasurable gift of humility that we may become the persons that you made us to be. In Jesus’ name we pray. Amen.